The struggle is real. When the world is caving in on me, I sometimes need a break to regroup. It has been about one month. While I regroup, at times I slip into a darker place where I have to face my unwanted emotions, mostly sadness. Other times I feel grounded, myself. This usually happens after I have faced sadness and pulled myself out into a lighter space. I really have to listen to what I want to be doing. Movie night ? A walk ? Cooking (yes cooking !) ? Sewing ? Reading ? Dancing in my appartment ? I then feel alive. Like a prisoner who had to face her worst enemy by doing something good for herself.
Weird right ?
Basically when I am in the selfloathing, self hating place, I have to tangibly and actively show myself that I am worth my love.
Then I am back into living again.